Have you seen my keys?

The good news? I'm finally over my cold.

The bad news? Apparently, I've lost my mind.

And my keys.

The following is a true story.

I worked a desk shift at the Freeps tonight. So I parked my car downtown. I fumbled around for some change. I got out of my car and walked about five feet to the parking meter. I took my laptop bag and my lunch out of the car and then I locked the car.

OK, I tried to lock the car. But that's not a good idea if you don't have your keys.

So let me review. Somehow I lost a set of keys (about a half-dozen) on a large key ring in/around my car in the time it takes to walk five feet.

I looked for a solid 20 minutes in, out, on top of and even under my car. I emptied out both my lunch bag and my lap top bag. Twice. I checked my pockets 17 times. Nothing.

I even enlisted a co-worker to help me go back to the car and we both repeated the search. Nada.

My loving wife drove an hour to give me my spare key and she resumed the search. Zilch.

Soooooo ...

One of three things happened. Someone stole my keys. I put my keys some place inside my car, my bags or my body (Yikes!) that it either so obvious or so remote that it obscures them totally or my keys were sucked through a space/time vortex.

I vote for option three. I'm sure someone on some other planet suddenly had a set of keys on a Red Sox key chain turn up unexpectedly and they are writing a blog about the strangest thing to happen to them in a long, long time.

At any rate, if you find my keys ... or my mind, let me know.

On an unrelated note, tomorrow (today?) OK, Tuesday I will resume editing photos taken over last couple of weeks, including the BFA girls hockey championship photos and the MVU boys hockey and boys basketball semifinal photos.

If you want to be notified when they are posted, shoot me an email or leave a comment.

Manning's still the man

I'll admit I got it all wrong in my Super Bowl pick - I loved the Colts to spank the Saints.

But then again being wrong is nothing new - when it comes to picking the outcome of games, I'm seldom right.

Mainly because I pick my favorites, not necessarily the team that I think will win.

In other words, I pick with my heart.

And my heart still loves Peyton Manning.

Sure, he blew the Super Bowl. Who cares?

We all make mistakes. What's really important is that we not take life, or ourselves too seriously.

And, as this video (a SNL mock-public service ad) will show, Peyton doesn't take himself too seriously at all.

My Tiger tale

I still like Tiger Woods.

There, I said it.

Let the clucking of tongues begin.

I know, he's a heel - and a dumbass, if you'll pardon my French - for what he did to his poor wife and kids.

But you know what? I don't care.

Or as 80s blues rocker George Thorogood once sang 'That don't confront me none.'

What do I care if he's so shallow and so twisted that he feels compelled to sleep with anything with humps? As long as he stays away from my wife and my daughter, he's good by me.

I don't need him to be a role model. I don't need him to be perfect. I don't need him to be anything other than what seems to be in his for-public-consumption personae - a great golfer and an oftimes charming chap.

What he does when the cameras are off and the golf clubs are in the trunk is none of my concern and should be none of our business.

But some folks - especially the media - can't get enough of it.

I understand the compulsion - I like car crashes with the best of y'all. But after 5 seconds I look away. I don't need pull the car over and grill the cops, the drivers and the witnesses for every detail. Other people's suffering simply isn't that 'amusing' - and I mean that in the strictest meaning of the word. Look it up.

I'm not judging, I'm just saying.

If you are entertained and amused by watching Tiger twist in the wind, have at it. It's open season. Drink your fill.

But I'm going to take a pass.

Not because I'm offended, per se. I just think it's a non story.

Some married guys - present company excluded, thank you very much - sleep around. So do some married women. It's a fact. But it's not news.

Don't misunderstand, it was news when Tiger crashed his SUV. Big news.

But after the cops failed to do anything about it, the rest of the story became a freakshow. And, to me, a bore.

Now if it turns out that Tiger did HGH, broke some law (and breaking a vow is not breaking the law) or if he goes postal due to the stress, then it's time to report on him again.

Until then, I think Tiger should be given the same treatment that people like A-Rod (an admitted cheater, vow-breaker and all-around shmuck) get - in other words, a free pass.

But that won't happen until Tiger speaks to the media.

The media will poke, probe, castigate and humiliate Tiger until he deigns to speak with them. Then, and only then, can his inevitable redemption begin.

Until then, here's a couple of videos that should remind you of why we liked the guy in the first place and why - once the media lets us - we'll embrace him again.

How can you hate the guy who does this ad?

His best ad ever.

Who can forget this shot?

And the guy can laugh at being a loser.

People are strange

Just got back from Enosburg shooting basketball team photos and saw this little gem in my email inbox.

Before you read it, bear in mind I don't know this person and have never communicated with them.

That said, he's obviously thinks I'm a bad person for selling photos.

Oh well ... can't please 'em all I guess.

Here's the email -- hope it makes you laugh as much as it made me laugh!

On Dec 16, 2009, at 3:07 PM, (someone I don't know) wrote:

Right clicking on a photo is not the only way to save them. Why the hell would anyone buy pictures of family with the technology we have today? I'm sure everyone that wants pictures brings their own camera and takes them for free. I know I did, and the pictures have a quality that is equal to the pictures you took. Also, the most i have ever paid to print a digital photo (4 x 6)  is $0.26, and thats for a single photo, if I were to print more than one, it would be even cheaper than that! I think it's cool that you take the pictures and post them for family and friends to look at, but selling them is simply taking advantage.

Wowsers! He busted me!

Yep, I'm a millionaire and I made it all taking sports photos and selling them for $2.99 each!

Oh well, nothing left to do but keep perpetuating the myth and therefore I'm off to go rip off the fine MVU and Milton hockey parents by taking photos of their kids with the knowledge they all will soon be overpaying for them, adding to my huge stack.

I'm rich, rich I tellsya! RICH!

(Insert sinister laugh here!)

Geeeesh.

I'm willing to be wrong

I'm still not over my grump about not getting Halladay (who pitches against the Yankees on Tuesday), but I'm willing to concede I missed the boat on Victor Martinez.

Some background.

I own not one, but two Jason Varitek T-shirts - I'm not a jersey guy and you shouldn't be either - but I digress.

I respect the Captain and all he has given the franchise, but his time has come. If he's willing to take a back seat to V-Mart, I'm surpised and relieved. 'Tek has value as a 3-day-per-week catcher. As long as V-Mart is allowed to catch three times, DH against lefties and spell Youk at first once a week, I'll buy into the plan.

But if 'Tek is catching five games a week, this is a dumb trade.

I still think 'Tek's ego (and by the way, if he wasn't on the 2003 steroids list then I will walk to Boston ... naked!) will get in the way and that come playoff time a rotation of Beckett, Halladay and Lester has a better chance to win than Beckett, Lester and ...

If, as reported, the cost for Halladay was only Bard, Bucholz and two minor league batters, then Theo missed the boat.

This will be a huge week for the Nation with two against the Rays - who own the Sox, especially at the 'Trop - and four in the Bronx.

By this time next week, the Sox could be golden or in a world of hurt.

###

On an unrelated note, the photo biz continues to eat up much of time, but I still hope to post some photos from the Buffalo Soldier event and give my two-cents about our amazingly patient Guv.

I also might have a rip-job to do on a client and will try to fit in the story of a little, skinny old guy who wanted to punch me out at Costco today.

Stay tuned.

(If you like my posts, it might be a good idea to subscribe to this blog so you don't have to check back to see if I have posted anything recently.)

Thanks for reading this - I'm stunned at the number of hits the blog has received in the past four days!